Recently on the blog we discussed how remote learning is affecting our kids. It increases screen time, produces hyperactive and hypersensitive behaviors, and lessens real time hands on instruction by teachers. I’m sure we’ve all found this to be true and quite impactful this year.
Our once happy, playful, and routine driven children are now being plagued by lack of self regulatory behaviors, increased tantruming, and non-existent coping mechanisms. This can very strongly be linked to their overstimulation and time on screens.
With the heavier tech usage it’s quite important that we begin taking this situation into our own hands. As the adults who can show a little more regulation with regards to screen time (or can we?), it’s necessary that we teach our children and students boundaries around this. We must also provide opportunities for screen time drops.
Yes, you heard me. It’s possible to have your kids drop their screens. It’s also quite necessary. Let’s look at how.
*How Screen Time Has Progressed
Before we do though it’s important to review what screen time has looked like over the past few years and what it’s been like recently. Honestly, when I was growing up screens were by no means as frequent as they are now. I was also quite fortunate to live on a block with many other families who had similar age children. We played outside all of the time, and I mean all the time. And when we were inside we had reading periods, homework always came first, and all meals were screen-less. Of course we had tv time once everything else was done but by no means to the degree it is now. It seems like a completely different world just those few years ago.
With the rise of new technologies and numerous screen type formats, it is certain that they’ll impact our kids daily lives more and more. Screens are prevalent in long car rides, used as restaurant distracters, used during home meal times, and of course a rewards option throughout the day. And this was all pre-pandemic.
The balance between screen time and “IRL” moments has fallen quite significantly to the screen. So it is important that we begin tipping the scales back in our favor. The favor of having discussions without tech distractions, social media influence, video game aggression, etc.
So let’s start working on it and see what we can do. It’s time to get proactive about our kids hands on experiences and spark real joy in their daily lives again. Let’s get into the tips.
*Tips and Tricks to Create Those Screen Time Drops!
1. Definitely discuss the effects! Make them understand.
So the first thing you’re going to want to do is have an open discussion with your child. It doesn’t matter how old they are, simply skew your conversation and language to the appropriate level for them. Use terminology and vocabulary they know, speak slower the younger they are, and motivate them to ask questions.
Also make sure to have a discussion with them rather than talking at them. By doing this and including them in the process, it takes away the issue of them feeling lectured at or demanded to do something. The goal is to simply have an open discussion about how screens can make them feel less like themselves and honestly, how they can hinder their growth. But again, you’re going to do that with terminology that makes sense to them.
2. Create boundaries together for screen time.
Another wonderful tip, after having open discussions about the effects of screen time and over use of tech, is creating healthy boundaries around it.
Again you’re going to want to do this together so they are a part of the decisions and really feel like they can manage these new boundaries themselves.
Sometimes if you begin to enforce new rules on your kids they’ll feel overwhelmed, confused, and may show some defiance against them. If you want to head in a positive direction, you’ll definitely want to work on this tip together.
3. What about tech free periods?
Another great tip is reminding your kids about activities and events they can do that is tech free!
Remind them how much fun they have when playing with their siblings.. or their friends. Remind them of hands on materials they used to enjoy or playing outside. We have not always had iPhones in our hands, screens for school, and iPads at restaurants. They can do this!
Get them involved in real life situations again. Make them live in the present! Remind them how much fun it can be.
But do this by providing fun opportunities for them to experience again. It’s not as easy just saying “remember when we used to play board games and color?” No, you need to pull out those materials, hopefully its their preferred materials, and get them excited again.
Once you get them engaged, it will begin to reinvigorate them and remind them how fun it can be to be off screens. But practice makes perfect so the more opportunities they have for this the better.
4. Now it’s time to create the tech routine.
The next tip is to create a flow in reaching actual resolutions for these instances. What this basically means is that your kids still need a proactive reason to follow through with real life experiences. Just having a discussion about why it’s important won’t really get your kiddos moving. However, working together with them, hand in hand, in creating an actual structure or routine of what that looks like will teach them how to behave in those instances.
It is important to do this together. Especially when working on something as highly addictive and enticing as screen time, they’re not going to willingly listen to your boundary or consequence. But if you work on a structure that you both create together then the cooperation will be that much more involved on their side. Working together versus pushing consequences is much more beneficial.
5. Create 2/3 free screen time passes.
My next tip will definitely be one your kids love. Why you ask? Because it will actually award them more screen time. Yes, I know I know…we are looking to minimize screen time but hear me out.
We definitely want to create an atmosphere around screen time where it is healthy, safe, and should be viewed as a privilege. In the previous tip we discussed creating a routine and structure together. Well this tip is meant to help promote said routine with further success by allowing “coupon” like treats for an extra screen time period here and there.
For example, if you have screen time only allowed for zoom remote learning, and your kids are meant to take a break from screens for the rest of the day after that… you could implement a rewards coupon. Meaning, if your child does really well during their online zoom periods they can receive up to 3 screen time coupons per week to use when they want.
By doing something like this it just really makes it easier for your kids to feel like you’re not completely restricting them of free screen time. It creates the balance between what is viewed as a healthy amount but still restricts what is too much. This in turn will also lead to less defiance and more cooperation.
6. Get the screen time checklist!
The last tip I’m sharing in this post is one that I actually utilize for really any area of organization. And that is basically to make a checklist for all the items you have discussed with your kiddos in regards to screen time boundaries, routines, instructions, etc.
Now, you always want to start by having the discussion. But discussions are fluid, should be ongoing, and can be fleeting at times.
By having an actual concrete checklist, it provides a hard copy of everything you discussed with your kids. Plus, visual aids are always a win when working with kids. Whether it is a picture, clipart, checklist, fact sheet, etc. having something tangible helps root the ideas you created together.
The idea for this checklist is to phrase it by using questions, and questions only. That way it doesn’t look as if your commanding them to put something away, which we all know can cause push back. By simply utilizing question reminders, it really puts the onus on them to evaluate their screen usage for that day and make the decisions about it’s necessity moving forward.
Here are some sample questions you can use!
= is it necessary?
= have you hit your screen time limit?
= do you have a screen time pass?
= have you considered other options?
= have you gotten outside today?
Of course you can also add your own! Adapt it to what works for you and your kids and place it somewhere it is easily seen. I would put it on the fridge, which is a very frequented area. So should a discussion arise about wanting more screen time, just calmly and casually ask your child to go do their checklist!
*Summary
There you have it! 6 simple tips you can use in your household right away to help curb the tech junkie appetite. Again, it is up to us, especially with all the online learning happening this year, to create a healthy balance of tech usage and hands on experiences for our kids. Even more though, it is important to help teach them about the effects of tech usage and what a healthy routine with tech looks like.
I would also recommend following these tips in order if doable. They will have a better flow if done so but of course should you find an even better way for your family go with that.
However, I did write them in a way to build off of one another. So if you’re really looking for some assistance, start with tip 1 and move on through until you reach tip 6.
You can also visit my other posts on tech usage and remote learning down below. We’ve definitely been talking about it more and more on the blog as we’ve been moving through this hybrid online school year.
And as always, If you have any questions, comments, or ideas please share them in the comments section below with your fellow parents! And definitely subscribe to the newsletter for updates and ongoing happenings at TylekTeaches.com. The subscription link is just at the bottom of this post.
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